God Reality? A Testimony (6)
November 10th 2009 02:38
(6) Tainted
“It is possible for you to reach it (the Kingdom), but you will grieve a great deal.” — Jesus, The Gospel of Judas.
As adults, we all walk well-worn paths, products of our childhood environment. Of course, genetics play a role, however, the nuns don’t say: ‘give me a child until they’re six and you’ll never change them’ for nothing. We seek out partners with the qualities of our parents, friends of similar kind. We at times repeat the same mistakes over and over until a particular lesson is learnt. Yet, there was no lesson (for me) to be learnt from what happened at Chevalier College, nothing I could have done would have changed anything. I wasn’t a product of a sexually abusive environment, nor did I seek to be abused. Why then, did I let it happen again?
First, I did not let it happen. Like most victims of abuse, I just thought that way for many years. It wasn’t until I became an adult did I realise that for sexual abuse to occur, three things must be present: a particular set of circumstances, an evil mind, and the victim—who of course has little or no control over the situation. In my particular case, being left at home alone at times for days on end, and a gardener/handyman called George.
It happened one year after my escape from Chevalier. I don’t know or have ever known George’s surname, but I do know he’s been dead for many years. He started work for my parents as a general-hand in the hotel they owned at that time called ‘The Panorama’. Then when the hotel was sold, they retained him to maintain the house and gardens at the family home. To me, George was a seemingly harmless old man who lived in a shack on the vacant block we owned adjacent home. However, at this stage George was on his best behaviour due to my parents being around most of the time. It wasn’t until they purchased another hotel and began spending from Thursday to Sunday there, did George show his true colours.
Either my parents’ thought it was okay to leave a fifteen-year-old teenager in the care of a man they knew virtually nothing about, or like me, were fooled by George’s seemingly innocuous facade. It matters little now, other than for the process of learning—parents need to be very careful in whose care they leave their children. (Cont.)
“It is possible for you to reach it (the Kingdom), but you will grieve a great deal.” — Jesus, The Gospel of Judas.
As adults, we all walk well-worn paths, products of our childhood environment. Of course, genetics play a role, however, the nuns don’t say: ‘give me a child until they’re six and you’ll never change them’ for nothing. We seek out partners with the qualities of our parents, friends of similar kind. We at times repeat the same mistakes over and over until a particular lesson is learnt. Yet, there was no lesson (for me) to be learnt from what happened at Chevalier College, nothing I could have done would have changed anything. I wasn’t a product of a sexually abusive environment, nor did I seek to be abused. Why then, did I let it happen again?
It happened one year after my escape from Chevalier. I don’t know or have ever known George’s surname, but I do know he’s been dead for many years. He started work for my parents as a general-hand in the hotel they owned at that time called ‘The Panorama’. Then when the hotel was sold, they retained him to maintain the house and gardens at the family home. To me, George was a seemingly harmless old man who lived in a shack on the vacant block we owned adjacent home. However, at this stage George was on his best behaviour due to my parents being around most of the time. It wasn’t until they purchased another hotel and began spending from Thursday to Sunday there, did George show his true colours.
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